“I exist as I am, that is enough…”

Walt Whitman

what I am is unsure
of just about everything
but your love
I try to make that enough
but most times
it’s not
in the darkness
when I try to pray
I’m not sure who I’m praying to
when I try to define what I am
or what I want
or what I need
I can’t do it outside of your love
I am the gray thing without you
I am worn out from just being
till I’m sitting beside you on the couch
or lying in bed beside you
or nestled in one of your (standing on a chair) hugs
and that is not enough
I need to be a genuine I
not a some what whatever afterthought of a person
but still
I love being loved by you
and loving you in return